Mattatarian.com

August 12, 2008
by Matt
0 comments

The Kid Will Ride Again

Mark - aka "The Kid", aka "Taco Gypsy"Yesterday, my friend Mark was on his way to work when he was in a motorcycle accident. He was less than a half a mile from the office when a woman pulled out of a parking lot onto the street. Due to the fact that it was raining, he was unable to brake or maneuver around the car. He ran right into her wheel and was thrown off of his bike, over the car and onto the center divider.

Thankfully, Mark is a very cautious rider who always wears not only a helmet, but also riding boots and a full protective jacket with padding. Though he had this protection, he was still left with some pretty nasty injuries, including: a fractured pelvis, a fractured left leg, a bad skin tear and a black eye. He will probably be in the hospital for a while, and then even longer before he is back and riding and at work. Here is to wishing him a quick recovery. After all, someone has to take Ghost Rider’s place (and no, I don’t mean that horrible movie or lame comic. I mean the REAL Ghost Rider from Sweden).

August 12, 2008
by Matt
1 Comment

Announcing: Irritated Tuesdays!

A few months ago I stumbled across a local blog called The Lost Ogle. I was delighted to find a group of malcontents, who, much like myself enjoy railing on Oklahoma City “celebs”, commercials and mouth breathing politicians. Shortly after becoming a regular reader, the gents at Lost Ogle though it wise to help those of us in Oklahoma City connect with the poor saps in Tulsa, by bringing in a weekly guest columnist. Enter The Irritated Tulsan.

Being a native of the Tulsa area, my first reaction was to pick up surrounding objects and begin throwing them at this guest writer. I left for OKC over 8 years ago, and though, while I miss those green things called trees, Coney Islander, BIll & Ruth’s, Kilkenny’s and my beloved QuikTrip, I have never regretted my move. Tulsa is, and will forever be, an avatar of my redneck past. So I did what any jerk on the interweb would do: complaine. However, the Irritated Tulsan being the swell guy he is, we came to an understanding. An understanding based on our mutual love of QuikTrip. As an even greater gesture of understanding, he began writing a weekly post called, Mattatarian’s Food Offering of the Week. In this column, he has kept me apprised of all the wonderful food QT has to offer.

So now my friends, I am launching Irritated Tuesdays on Mattatarian.com. Every Tuesday I will be posting a banner linking to that weeks Food Offering. While you are there, read the rest of his blog. His has become one of my most frequently visited blogs, enjoying his irreverant and entertaining stories on life in T-town.

And yes, I am totally ripping off The Lost Ogle’s idea, though I don’t like to call it that. I like to call it, synergy. Or maybeyou would call it a blog-énage à trois?

August 9, 2008
by Matt
1 Comment

Yes, I Do Believe You Have Found Your Calling

After years of losing their identity, many chain restaurants sail past mediocre and straight into boderline terrible. Sonic, along with Braum’s (I’ll save my rant on Braum’s for another day) is one of those. It has become one of those chains which I frequently tell myself not to return to. Yet, foolishly lured by a desire for all things new and being bombarded with advertisements, I eventually succomb thinking, “this time will be different”.

This time, Sonic’s siren song was their new Angus Bacon Cheesburger. Their website describes it as:

100% pure Angus Bacon Cheeseburgers just for you. Choose from Hickory, Jalapeño or Classic style topped with all the fresh fixin’s, crispy bacon, American cheese, and served on a soft ciabatta bun.

Upon arriving at the Sonic drive thru, I had to hastily decide between classic or the other two styles. This being a Sonic known for getting orders wrong, I went with the classic since that is what I would have been given had I ordered the jalapeño. However, when I tried placing my order, the girl working the drive thru kept reading it back as a regular bacon cheese burger. Both of us at a loss, she requested that I drive to the window and order there. When I arrived at the window I tried once again to order, “The Angus Bacon Cheeseburger, and that will be all.” The girl looked as if I was speaking another language. Finally, after repeating my order 3 more times, she cocked her head and asked, “a who?”

It was at this moment I realized this girl had probably made the best possible career choice for herself. I made one last attempt, speaking very slowly and pointing to the picture of the burger. Success! After waiting for a few minutes for my burger to be cooked to order (something I actually appreciated) I had my order and was on my way back to the office to chow down. To be fair, although my mind was replaying her asking, “a who?”, over and over, I must say she was very friendly during the whole ordeal.

Now, to the burger. It was assembled with care, still very hot and obviously fresh. The bacon was cooked perfectly and the angus patty was actually pretty good. The bun, which was supposed to be ciabatta, was anything but real ciabatta. It was a very fluffy and light bun that had the outer appearance of a ciabatta like bread, but lacked the firmness and large air bubbles of the real thing. Overall, it was actually a pretty good burger. That said, it was definately not worth the $5 and some change that I paid for it. Had that total included a drink and a side, or if the patty had been more substantial in size, then we would be looking at a great deal. Unless they lower the price before taking this off the menu, its probably okay to skip it and just get the regualr bacon cheeseburger. Your wallet and your full stomach will thank you for doing so.

August 7, 2008
by Matt
4 Comments

The Mattatarian v3.0!

I just finished updating to the latest version of WordPress, as well as creating a new look for the site. This new version should load faster and will allow me to add more features.

Not to mention the fact that the brighter look should help you avoid the urge to load a playlist full of early 90′s mope rock, draw spider webs on your face with mascara and write poems about how sad you are. The old look was so dark, even I got down in the dumps when making a post. Well, no more because its a new day at Mattatarian.com. A new day full of sunshine and rainbows and unicorns and tacos and QuikTrip and Muchacos….
More posts to come!

July 22, 2008
by Matt
6 Comments

All Hail The Steve

The amazing Steve Jobs and his fabtabulous iPhone have done it again. Much to my delight, when I checked the latest apps on the Apps Store, I noticed the addition of a WordPress app. For over a year I have been searching for a way to make posts through my phone. It wasn’t until I bought my iPhone in April that this became a reality… sort of.

While the last two posts were made from my iPhone, I have had to jump through hoops to make that happen. As a result, I rarely ever post. However, this new WordPress app will change that problem. I’m not promising a new post everyday, but I can say they will now be more frequent than once every two months.

So rejoice, my one or two readers, and give thanks to The Steve.

July 17, 2008
by Matt
3 Comments

the most awesome shirt, ever.

Most awesome shirt, ever
So those of you who know me might be shocked to learn I recently visited a western clothing store. While there, I found what is quite possibly, the most awesome shirt on the planet. My wife begs to differ, but when has that ever stopped me?

The only problem is these shirts are a little more pricey than the fine Target tshirts which make up my current wardrobe. But if I have my druthers, and about $300, I’m going to change my look from Techno Hobo, to Western Swingatarian. Of course, that’s if the good Lord’s willing and the creek don’t rise. See? I’m already working on the lingo.

May 28, 2008
by Matt
1 Comment

Things I Am Grateful For

10. Beer. “The cause of and solution to, all of life’s problems.” – Homer Simpson
9. Steve Jobs and his wonderful iPhone, without whom this post would not have been possible.
8. The annual, “Friends Of The Library” book sale. Yeah, that’s how I roll.
7. My friend Terry’s seemingly endless supply of coupons for free McDonalds Chicken Biscuits.
6. Having friends that are not disturbed or horrified that I do not care about OU football, or sports in general.
Oh, no! Flying whales!
5. Having friends who agree that most of the beers made by the big three American brewers are a crime against beer.
4. That despite the predictions from scientists in the 1980′s, neither myself or anyone I know has been killed by killer bees.
3. Taco Bueno, even when its surly employees, perplexed by the complexities of Muchaco engineering, make my Muchaco with the shell inside out.
2. A wife who carries Tabasco sauce in her purse and loves my beer.
1. The fact that whales cannot fly.

July 24, 2007
by Matt
1 Comment

Yet another blog, no one will ever read

So I’ve decided to start this blog, after years of speaking unfavorably of blogging. Why the change of heart? Simply put, I needed a place to air my grievances, relay new life experiences to friends and family and explain my views on politics and philosophy to the bewildered same. Sure, there are social networking sites such as MySpace and Facebook, but one can only stand a certain amount of insurance ads where tasering a gnome will win you a free iPod, horribly designed layouts with transparent text, being scared to death when an unexpected song loads and the endless barrage of bulletins consisting of surveys asking to whom you last gave an active comfort hug.

This being mostly a cathartic exercise, and my having a life in the real world, worry not of me if you choose not to return. There will be no stubby Cheeto stained fingers, wiping away tears because of low viewership, seeking solace in another 20 hour stint playing World Of Warcraft in a mother’s basement. Nay, I will be spending my time with my beautiful wife Amy, in fellowship with the brethren or practicing the ancient art of brewing ale (and the occasional lager). If you do so choose to return, then I hope you enjoy it and leave comments in response to the posts. Also, IF you do intend on returning, subscribe to the RSS feed so you don’t have to bother with actually coming to this site to see if I’ve posted anything new.

Goodbye and Godspeed.